My husband and I have these mutual friends. For years, his wife worked nights and went to school during the day so they never saw each other. Their relationship always seemed very peculiar to us. They seemed to do everything apart, even vacations. He spent a lot of time hanging at our house on the weekends and the three of us got to be very close. I never really knew her.
Then she graduated. She started coming around more. I realized that I really didn’t like her much, at least not nearly as much as him. She was always so condescending. My husband had said that she must feel uncomfortable around me. He thought her husband might have said something about me some time in the past that made her jealous. He never went into detail with that. Maybe it’s his own insecurities. Maybe it’s his own ego thinking everyone should be into me. She isn’t anything to look at so, there’s that too. But, I’m going to go with: he’s a smart man and it doesn’t take much to tune into other people.
Then one night we had them over for dinner. I got black out drunk. The next day my husband said I had been really flirty with her husband and she seemed mad.
A few weeks later, a similar situation occurred.
They used to invite us to everything. They used to call pretty often wanting to get together for dinner or drinks. We used to be so friendly.
They haven’t called to invite us to anything since that second night.
She is pregnant now. After a very long time of trying. And, she is a bit older than us. I want to assume that she is just tired and focusing on other things now. That they aren’t throwing the little parties that they used to. That, it isn’t me.
But, I honestly think it is me.
He always gave me the vibe that he was into me. And I think she always knew.
I miss the friendship that the three of us had. Even though I know things will never be that way again, I wish the four of us could be friendlier again. It really bothers me that they have been leaving us out of things and never confronted me as to why.
I do have to put myself in her shoes. If a woman made me feel that way about my husband, I wouldn’t want to have her around either. In fact, we do have a mutual friend that gives me that vibe and I never invite them over for that exact reason.
So I guess that’s my answer right there. There’s just nothing I can do. What’s done is done. I should have never made her feel that way and I truly am sorry. I don’t have any desire to pursue anything with her husband. I am happily married. I just like to flirt sometimes. I would never act on it. Never.
I guess I just wish I could tell her that I am sorry. Maybe next time I get that drunk I can work on that. Talking about my feelings. I have never been good at that. I can write about them. I can write to the moon and back. But, to actually speak the words? I have a really hard time with that. A near impossible, choking on my own thoughts type of time with that.
Well, I am glad I got this out finally. I feel a little bit better now.
Anyone experience anything like this and have advice for me?